My favorite form of punctuation is the ellipse. Because so...much can happen betwixt those three little dots...
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Plimco out of water
They actually say that. Isn't that cute? They say, "Quiet on the set!" and then at the very end when it's all over, they say "That's a wrap!" Ha! That pleases me for some reason. They also do that very same count down thing they do in Wayne's World where they count down from 10 and then stop saying it out loud at 5 and then do the numbers with their fingers and then whirly point to you for action. It's like discovering that the rumors were true. That's really how it DOES work.
I've shot a video before, but it was more real-time, do what I always do only I was miked. They were just filming a workshop, so we didn't really need to do anything different, there wasn't a script or takes or anything. It was more like reality television. So, this was kind of my first "on set" experience. I didn't tell anybody that. And you know? I'm not sure they even noticed. Yay.
I was nervous and felt like I was in a different country at first, just trying to get my bearings, getting used to all the equipment. But they didn't shoot my scene first, so I got a chance to twirl around in my chair and get used to my desk and then by they time they got to me, I was fine. It's a lot of sitting around and waiting. And there is this sense of wasting a good take. Like, we'd be rehearsing and .... I don't know, it's like you want to "save" yourself for the camera. Or, you do a good rehearsal and you think, dang. The cameras should have been on for that.
There's no immediate payoff like with theatre either. I miss that. They're hoping to get this all edited and crap by July. So, they just shout "That's a wrap!" to which I giggle and we all gather our stuff and go home. No applause, no sense of a finished product. It's weird.
With theatre you get a chance to come back the next night and do it again, discover more stuff with your role. I felt kind of cheated. I mean I learned all my lines! And now, what? I just forget them? I don't need them anymore? I don't need to say them for the next month or so? Weird.
I looked right in that camera though. Just like I should have. Hello camera. And my head didn't explode. I hope I didn't have any boogers. I think my hair may have been doing something weird too. God, I'm not sure I'll even be able to watch it when it's all done.
Film is strange.
I didn't HATE it, but... It was such a hurry up and shoot your wad kind of acting that... I mean, it WAS acting. Briefly. And then acting the same scene again so that they could do close ups. And then acting the same scene again so that they could do an establishing shot. And then sitting around while people messed with booms and lights and goofing off with Cher and the other actors and then oh! Pay attention again.
I was too short for my desk. They had to frantically look for phone books so that I didn't look teeny behind it. I ended up sitting on several sand bags. Ah, film magic. I also used a highly technological paper towel roll to speak through off camera when I was supposed to be coming through an intercom system in space. Hee hee.
And it was stupid because I was projecting. There was no need to project. And I knew this intellectually, but I still wanted to articulate and project because it's just programmed into me somehow. If I do this "film" thing again ever, I want to try not talking so loud, take advantage of the fact that I don't have to. I also want to play with more subtle facial movement.
God, I'm such a stage actor. Everything is all big. Way too big.
Well, the scene was a farce, so hopefully it worked.
Eh. Film is weird.
Sentence of the Day 5/20
"Quiet on the set!"
Labels: sentence
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
SPACE!
I'm shooting a little video this afternoon that's going to go up on the Internet somewhere. Isn't that exciting? I've hit the big time. Ha.
It's about SPACE! I love space. Space is funny. There are astronauts in it and disembodied body parts and space shuttle accidents and celebrity appearances. I think it is hilarious on paper, but who knows what the hell it is going to look like once we film it all low budget in front of a blue screen. Maybe I'll let you see it once it's done. I mean it will be on the Internet after all. We'll see. You'll have to be nice to me.
I get to boss all the astronauts around and fire one of them. I'm like the MAIN astronaut. Kind of.
I guess one of the actors slipped and broke her neck the other day. We had to replace her. And another actor's major family member just died. The whole production seems to be doomed. I hope I'm not next, these things come in threes.
Being an astronaut is dangerous, apparently.
I so so very rarely deal with the medium of film. It's kind of terrifying. All those cameras and the....permanence of it. Ugh. I hope I'm able to get over all that and just ... can the best performance, the least self-conscious one. But that's the thing, I'm always conscious of the camera in a way that is unsettling. Not like being conscious of the audience... I don't know, I need to get over it though. Soon. In a few hours.
3...2...1...BLAST OFF!
Yay, space.
Sentence of the Day 5/19
"Ok seriously you are like the funniest girl I think I've ever talked to.
Not even kidding."
Labels: sentence
Monday, May 19, 2008
Schum Schentences
5/15
"I think it takes a lot to be able to respect someone and disagree with them; if you learn this art, you will go far."
5/16
"There are many things in this world that are dead and dying."
5/17
"I never threw my panties out the window during a pantie raid...although I was accused of it!"
5/18
"Can I have the last kiss?"
Labels: sentence
Thursday, May 15, 2008
I hate auditioning.
Sometimes. Usually. Most of the time. When they don't cast me.
Yesterday, I had such a shitty audition. It was for a great, classic play. One I studied and work shopped in college. I rush across town after work, slapping makeup on my face, trying to unfrazzle my hair, putting Vaseline and base on my chapped red nose, mining all of the crusty bloody boogers out of my nostrils, drinking hot tea, convincing myself I don't sound like a snot troll, ignoring my fever that is rising again.
Here I come into the theatre. They give me a scene. A love scene. A scene where the character I am to read for professes her love to the man she, well... loves, I guess. It's steamy. They're in the woods, he's smoking a cigar, she's anxious. She throws her arms around him. They kiss. It's hot.
Here I go onto the stage and hello hello to everyone, lovely to see you, oh, here is your reader actor person who is going to be reading with you. She is a squat woman-child whom I have seen in a less-than-satisfactory show. I know you. Why are you reading my love interest? You could play a retarded little girl perhaps, but not a strong burly man.
What the fuck?
So, I read the scene. The scene that is about the chemistry and physical connection between two people....with this squat retard woman-child. It was horrible. Clearly. I mean, of course. How could it not be? I am an actor who can weep over her robot babies, but even if I could spew forth all of my bisexual tendencies that I could muster....I'm just sorry. It's not happening. They're not casting a squat retard woman-child in that role. I cannot feign chemistry with this squat retard woman-child. I mean, I certainly made stab at it. Certainly.
I finished and they all just grimaced. I looked at them for perhaps a, "OK, now try it THIS way" or, "We'll let you know about call-backs, what are your conflicts next week?" but instead I got a, "That's fine". That's fine. Christ.
Fine.
I hate them all.
I hate auditioning.
I hate that squat horrible person who I could never have chemistry with.
I have more chemistry with a cardboard box than her.
I hate that they were rude to me.
But I love that I shook the artistic director's hand....knowing I had just been mining for blood boogers....only moments before in my car. Heh heh.
You know? I don't know why I keep auditioning for that theatre company. I've hated everything I've ever seen them produce. Why do I keep auditioning for shit shows?
Still. I wish they would have cast me.
But they didn't!
So, fuck em.
I hate auditioning.
Sentence of the Day 5/14
"My Robot is beeyooteefl."
Labels: sentence
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Sentence of the Day 5/13
"4 for $5.00"
Labels: sentence
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Sentence of the day from..yesterday, I don't know the dateget off my backI'vehad afever for two days and have just emerged from my snotcoma
"To be with an 80-year-old woman in the body of a 20-year-old seemed a bit insane to Victor..."
Labels: sentence
Monday, May 12, 2008
Sentences of the Weekend
5/9
"I want her to sing at my funeral."
5/10
"I'm gonna blow up your house."
5/11
"As soon as you can convey to an audience that you don't need to be taken care of, a whole new range of roles open up for you to play."
Labels: sentence